Holy Shite!

Ola!!!

I just had the most incredible 5 day roadtrip of my life!!! We went to a festival (KKNK).
More info on that later aka a full blog!!! ready yourselves!

Cheers
Smithy out!

Bla Bla Bla, Yackedy Shmackedy

One more I come to thee!
Yes thats right. I am at work. The good news is that I only have 5 more minutes to go.
Thats right! I can go enjoy my friday!!!!
Now you have to understand, when I say enjoy, I mean: Go home, play Final Fantasy 8 and X-2 in random succsession till I fall asleep. Or watch tv till I pass out and fall asleep. Yes, You have me. I am a boring person. I would like to go out and get drunk, but thats not going to happen tonight dear readers, oh no. Tonights Final Fantasy Night!! (Joy!!!!!!)

Happy Friday everybody!!!

Smithy out....

A Blogging I will go...

It's been a total of about 2 hours since my last post. You'll be happy to know that i'm feeling much much worse now.
And Yes
For those
of you
Wondering/thinking....

Yes, I am a Whiney Bitch....

But!!!, I use my right to be whiney and bitchy freely, since this is my blog. Enough about me, lets talk about something stimulating, something very near to our hearts, and no, I'm not talking about anything remotely connected to hentai and final fantasy characters.

What I'm talking about is:

You ready for this??....

It's....

Britney Spears

Now before you all run away, screaming for God to smyte thee to lesson the shock, let's think about this for a while.... Ok, done. Everyone older than 20 and younger than 24 (a.k.a My demographic group) think back to the ninetees....

We're in highschool, it's 1999. It's almost so far back that techo's still cool. We even used the word dude (Actually, I still use the word Dude, anyways...). That faithful day when we first heard a girl singing, asking to be beaten... over and over again. She was nice back then, schoolgirl uniform, pigtails, he'll most of us wanted to date her, others just wanted to have her music video on the computer, for reasons I shall not mention here, as this is a famliy blog...tss...

In anycase, she was pure, she was beauiful, she was a virgin....(hopefully)....

Now for us guys, Virginity is Uber important, as we don't like used goods (This is not my opinion, frankly I don't care, it's their choice .). So for many of us, Britney going super skanky and etc. meant that our dreams were shattered. Never again would we dream of dating Britney.

All that remained for us was her music video's (Again for reasons undisclosed in this post).

And so Britney had gone from pop princess to Pop skank. Now you may ask yourself why not date a skank?! What's so bad about dating someone who sleeps with God knows who and how many? For those of you awaiting an answer, It was a retorical one. I'll spell it out for those who didn't see the obvious benefits of dating a skank...

ROTTING OF GENITALIA

and/or

LOSS THEREOF

So, in the end we all lost, we lost Britney, we lost our love of inosense, we even lost our Virginity!

Britney took from me, what no other could, the belief that in this world, super hot, famous and pretty girls, who sing skanky lyrics: Are Virgins.

Thank you Britney, thank you.

Oh well.... we'll always have Christina

Smithy Out...

Damnit Damnit Sonofabitch

Goodday.

I, at this moment in time, feel like a soggy piece of tissue. Literally!
I'm sick as a dog and I do not feel like doing anything. But as luck would have, I'm at work.

Screw Saturdays post, I feel much worse today, MUCH!!!
Hell I can't even be witty or sarcastic, I don't have the constitution for it.

SO thats all from me for today

Goodday...
I said Goodday!!

Oh Dear...

Consumer report:

Sake: Good!

Punch that tastes like fruitjuice (but is equal to a double brandy): BAD, BAD, BAD Very!! BAD

So last night, I went to the Red Peppa, it's a thai fusion / sushi bar, At our local Mall.

And there I had my first taste of Sake! My friends thought it tasted like shit, I thought it tasted quite nice actually. Only After a few minutes the stuff gets cold and GOOD GOD does it taste awefull then!

Apparantly really good quality Sake should be drank cold, and the lower quality stuff gets heated to hide the taste. Thus.... :/

Anyway, After the Sake experience ^o^

We went to our friends' birthday parties, which they held together so there would probably be more chicks. This is where the crapstick hits the fan. They had a 45 Litre barrel of home made punch, a.k.a. My Demise!

So we all drank punch, allot of it, that was ok, but after a while drinking the stuff wasn't enough for some people and so the funneling started. And at that very moment, I realized something:

Some Girls are SCARY!

There was this one girl that funnelled so much punch in 2 seconds flat I went drunk just looking at her! Guys twice her size couldn't beat her!!

As you all are wondering at this moment, How does last night relate to how I'm feeling today..

Well let me tell you in two words How I feel:

Fucking Terrible.

I'm sitting here at my job, with a hangover of the likes I have never felt. I'm still even a little drunk. I am not allowed to drink anything in the library nor eat anything. These two aformentioned acts are as we all know, vital to my liver's recovery prosess. So when I go home at two, I might even still be drunk and really really hungry.

Mommy....

The Utter Joy of Nothingness

Here in good ol SA, we are blessed with a telephone company Monopoly, only unlike Microsoft, our Monopoly isn't the smartest bunch of bananas.

But this blog isn't about complaining (sometimes), it's about spewing crap, so anyhoo...

I never had a good connection, our Monopoly didn't want me to download a Naruto episode in under a day. If I wanted to effectivaly copy illegal media, I had to pay them R650 a month!! Some of you might say: Dude! Naruto is worth sooo much more!! To these people I say: Yeah... :/

Unlucky-ily I don't have that money to my disposal every month, Being a student has other expenses like drinking and crap. So, as good fortune always comes walzing down the street in my direction holding a plackard with my name on it, I got a job with a decent connection and unlimited uptime. Now, you might be asking yourself: "Why the hell is he taking this long at getting to the point of it all?"

To those people I say, because. It's because of my wonderful job, and unlimited uptime that I'm typing this blog, just because I'm soo fucking bored out of my skulL!!!

Sure, internet is fun, but after 3 months, sitting on your ass, helping the occasional person every two hours to get book, You litteraly run out of things to do and surf.
I've read all the news, checked out all the webcomics and read through all the webpages mentioning naruto. I still have the unfathomably large world of Porn ahead of me, but the administrators at the vasity don't see to like porn, or rather don't like me hogging their bandwidth so they can watch live porn (Bitches).

For those who don't know, I work at a library, yes, I am a fucking shhhuuusshhing librarian.
Glorious!
I have about 2 hours left of my shift, then (thank God!!) I'm going out to the Red Pepper Thai fusion bar with long time bud of mine, Shadow_Bane and getting Pisssst on Sake, just like my Hero Jiraya-Sama (and maybe eat a little Ramen or any other noodle flavoured goodie ^o^).

Smithy signing off....

Eeh Gahd! Redux

And so, the story of " Death of a Student" Continues.....

Let's face it, all of us has stared Death in the face...
Be it in our dreams/nightmares, Driving while drunk or even a really good strafing, rocket firing assho..... I'm getting of track here.
Shit happens, so what if we die, hell I've done some meaningful stuff in my life, I'll die happy.

But what really gets me (right in the a-hole) is the fact that when something bad happens,
The Authorities or whoever dicides to be the rulers of us all, think the same shit's going to happen to us all!

Because of one little old first year dying because of boozing to much and hitting his head, we here in UFS land are being punished for it. Effective as of two days ago, all trade in booze on campus has been suspended until furthur notice! I mean come on! Just because one kid's head couldn't take a good old fashion blow, doesn't mean If I drink to much my head's going to crack!!!! Hell, I should have been dead long ago if that was the case.


So thats all I have to say about this subject, I wouldn't want you getting bored with my posts and think I'm only doing this because i have nothing better to do....Wait a minute.... Damnit!!!

Eeeh Gahd!!

Well Well.... What do you know!
I finally decided to post something meaningfull. Meaningfull in the sense of the word that I feel that i am contributing to my own existence by posting a non important blog :)

From this day onward, I'll be posting utter nonsense and spewing crap, just for the hell of it. Shit!, I'll even swear!! Fuck yeah!

Anyhoo, I figured since I spew large amounts of crap and always complain, I might as well complain about everything in such a matter that it is informative. (well kinda).

Today in good old SA (South Africa for the unintelligable), I was greeted with a most entertaining Newspaper article: Student found dead in bed, possible alcohol misuse suspect.
I mean come on.... suspect?
I'm not much of a detective, but lets review their findings:

A) There was a huge party at the hostel the night before.

B) The aforementioned student drank more than Darkhumor does in a week. :) (thenextozz.blogspot.com)

and finally C) He hit his head while drunk.

While this might all sound extremely boring to you all.... Hell its even boring to me!
It made me realize something: We could all have been that student.

Haven't we all woken up somewhere, in our beds if whe are lucky, wondering what the fuck happened last night and why is there a dog with me in my bed??

What about that time you woke up with that huge cut on you forehead, bleeding and sheets all red ( although the red sheets might have been all the booze you barfed out during the night)?

I know this all sounds really fimiliar to some of us!

To be continued....